Death is a funny thing. I don’t mean funny as in ha ha. I mean is funny like peculiar. We’re all going to die. (Yea, like you didn’t know that) But how people deal with death is so different that it strikes me as odd.
You hear shrinks all the time saying how everyone deals with death differently, or how to be careful because you never know how someone is going to handle the loss of a loved one or friend. That’s all true. Not discounting it. But don’t you find it curious how people even in the same family handle it differently? Siblings deal with it completely different from each other. Parents deal with it different than their spouse. But what happens when you throw complete dysfunction into the middle of it? Chaos. Pure chaos.
I think in a “normal” family, these types of events tend to bring families closer. They lean on each other for support, they feel comfortable crying, reminiscing, even laughing about the past. I think the dysfunctional family has a way of drawing the worst out of each other. When you add alcohol to the mix, it’s a recipe for disaster. Complete chaos. And when everyone is fighting, or manipulating, or being a complete ass, where is the support that is needed to cope with the grief? Does it ever get dealt with properly?
I also wonder about how that event gets looked back on after time. Does the funeral become so tainted with the bad memories of what happened there that the person who passed away gets lost in the drama and chaos? Is that what you want to remember when you think back to that person? Or can you compartmentalize it or even try to forget the scene and only remember the person? I would like to think so, but I don’t know.
At this point though, I can only hope for the best in what is going to be a horrible situation and pray that everyone escapes relatively unscathed. And pray for peace….not just for the one who passed away but for the whole family as well.